My Kingdom for a Hearse MOBI Ú My Kingdom Epub / for

My Kingdom for a Hearse ❰EPUB❯ ✵ My Kingdom for a Hearse Author Craig Rice – There has never been a woman as beautiful as top model Delora Deanne But Delora Deanne doesn't really exist Unknown to the panting public Delora is a composite of many women Her face is played by Gert There has never been a for a PDF ↠ woman as beautiful as top model Delora My Kingdom Epub / Deanne But Delora Deanne doesn't really exist Unknown to the panting public Delora Kingdom for a Epub á is a composite of many women Her face is played by Gertrude Bragg Torso and legs by Eula Stolz Hands Eva Strauss Brains Hazel Swackhammer But now Delora is coming apart Hazel Swackhammer receives the first in what is to be a series of beautifully wrapped presents Inside she is surprised to find a pair of pale lavender gloves containing the Hands of Delora Deanne.

  • Mass Market Paperback
  • 224 pages
  • My Kingdom for a Hearse
  • Craig Rice
  • English
  • 06 September 2015
  • 9780553262223

6 thoughts on “My Kingdom for a Hearse

  1. Jim Davis Jim Davis says:

    Another screwball comedy crime novel by Rice Not as funny as some of the earlier ones and probably a little longer than it needed to be While this was published in 1957 it still felt like we were in the 40's as with the previous novels

  2. Whistlers Mom Whistlers Mom says:

    If you're willing to overlook the bad pun in the title this is one of the most entertaining of Craig Rice's John J Malone series A bit confusing at first until you get the players sorted out but worth the effortThe action starts when Malone gets a call from expensive cosmetic maker Delora Deanne For years Malone has been drooling over the pictures of the luscious Delora and shivering to the dulcet tones of the cosmetic goddess and now he actually gets to met her Imagine his dismay when Delora turns out to be one Hazel Swackhammer who's appallingly average in looks and voice She's also grim business like and tight fisted The check is in the mail but it never arrivesAfter the first shock is over Malone discovers that the Delora Deanne of his dreams is a composite of five women each of whom contributes something face body hands feet voice to the total package that sells all those cosmetics Now a gossip columnist is trying to smear the image of Delora claiming that she's hooked up with a playboy Scandal is never welcome in advertising Even worse one of the models is missing and Hazel Swackhammer has received some embalmed body parts through the mail She wants Malone to find out who's behind itMalone meets the staff including the four extant models the company photographer who splices them together for the ads and the writer who vomits up the nauseating prose of the Delora Deanne ads There's also Ms Swackhammers' secretary who tries to pump Malone for information And Hazel mentions her former husband Charles Swackhammer of Swackhammer Funeral HomeShe claims her former husband is trying to destroy her business for spite Others claim that Hazel's still seething over the divorce and will do anything to hurt her former Cuddles Who's telling the truth?After that things really get odd Cuddles Swackhammer denies any part in the prank but he's connected to the company in a way that would surprise his former wife The photographer was once married to one of the models and is still carrying the torch for her The ad writer lives poorly supposedly wiped out by alimony payments but Hazel's secretary lives suspiciously wellThe models keep disappearing and the body parts keep arriving and one of the missing models has a gangster boyfriend who's convinced that Malone knows where his girl is He's a OK guy in a menacing sort of way but having him as a bodyguard doesn't make Malone inconspicuous as he tries to nose around town and figure out what's going onAt one point there's an actual provable death with an entire body and Malone suggests they call his friend Rico Rico is the cousin of Joe the Angel who owns City Hall Bar Malone's home away from home Rico runs a fine funeral establishment and is a fun guy who's up for anything That's good because he doesn't get back to the mortuary with the body before someone relieves him of it Now the police are asking uestions and Malone doesn't have any answersAnd where are Malone's friends and crime solving buddies Jake and Helene Justus? Jake already has the sketchiest employment record in Chicago and now he's no longer owner of a successful night club we never learn why and has become a television producer It's 1957 and everyone's excited about the new entertainment industry and everyone wants to be part of it Jake is the most sought after man in town by out of work singers actors directors musicians and assorted wanna be's But can he produce shows that the networks will air?As I said it's complicated and by the time Malone is explaining it all to an admiring audience he's Sherlocky that way I'd lost a few threads Not sure some of them were ever tied up but if you're a purist this may not be the series for you If you love off beat characters and bizarre situations and funny dialogue you'll enjoy them as much as I do

  3. Katrina Katrina says:

    I enjoyed reading this book though the constant I have an idea but I will not share it got a little blah by the end Although yes I can understand that if he told everyone everything there wouldn't be much of a book Also I need to read the ending again because somehow in the last few pages I managed to miss the motive of the whooollleeee crime But yeah a fun read and I was happy that I picked this up second hand at an amazing sale for 50 cents bargainOh also I feel I should mention my confusion at everyone drinking Its like hmm gotta solve a crime better head out for a drink Stop by a suspects house accept some alcohol drive somewhere else have a few drinks Oh noes the case is going no where better have some scotch coz its an emergencybut still enjoyed it as an easy read

  4. Glen Glen says:

    Great screwball mystery by Craig RiceDelora Deane was one of the most famous models in the world In reality she was the composite of five different women which was a closely guarded secretThen one day the woman with the model's hands disappeared and the head of the agency received a pair of embalmed hands in the mailJohn J Malone and his sidekicks Jake and Helen Justis have to track down the killer before Delora Deane's other four parts are killed Things get crazyA lot of fun

  5. Fishface Fishface says:

    I've read this one over and over Great Forties style noir mystery

  6. Bev Bev says:

    Meh Concept a whole lot interesting than the actual book

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